During a group meditation, a fellow initiate asked this question. Master, could You speak a little bit about the fact that our ego gets in the way of our close relationship with the God within? How to get rid of it?
That's how we get into the habits, to manage things the way we want so
that we get the spotlight. And that is what we call the ego. There is no
ego to begin with. And then we are so used to with failure and success, we
are proud of ourselves. We think, "Ah! I have accomplished this, and I
have done that. I out did him, I tricked them, and things like that." And
then we get prouder and prouder, and that is the so-called ego.
Habit Is The Information
Collected By The Mind
Actually, it is all habit. We are not born with the ego. That's why I told you that the environment is very important to the individuals. Two persons with the same level of intelligence if brought up in different environments will react differently to the same situation that they are confronted with because of the habit they acquired, because the things they learned during their childhood and their lives. So there is no ego really. Now we try to deal with the habit only.
For example, now you want to meditate, but you're so used to with running around - at 7 o'clock you go to coffee and 8 o'clock you go dancing and now I tell you to sit here. Miserable thing, and don't even see God sometimes, not always, yeah? Some lucky fellows see God all the time, and take it for granted, and some sit there, the bottom nearly falls off and don't see anything! So of course, these things will make you feel unhappy. And then it is difficult for you to believe that there is such thing as God, and that He is even loving at all. If He is loving, why doesn't he come to me, why He comes to the neighbors?
Because you tend to learn as you grow up to compare things the way the worldly people do. They teach you: the neighbor is better than you, his car is more expensive. Why God gives to him but not gives to me, things like that? And then this is the so-called ego, the argumentative mind, that they collected from the influence of the society. So now we have to do is that go contrary to that. Every time we think some nonsense, we say," Okay, that's just your habit. I don't believe in your garbage." And then just do your work, don't listen to the mind, and slowly you will get used to it.
For example, many children who grew up in a battered home, grow up to become criminals. They were not loved as a child. They grew up don't love anybody. They only know violence. They only know force, using muscle force or whatever force they can get to win the enemy, to become a stronger guy. Most of them are unloved, and then it's very difficult for them to change that. Then you would say that's their ego. Actually, I would say it's just a habit. When we say "habit", it's easier to understand, and also seems easier to reach and to correct, than to say "ego". It sounds so frightening, like an entity or something like that, that we have to fight with. It's not that difficult.
Even brushing the teeth, many people don't brush three times a day
because they don't have the habit, and they can't bother to change. I didn't
brush three times a day when I was young, but when I grew up I understand
it hurts my teeth, and I want to be beautiful. (Laughter) Then I start to
realize the importance of this habit, brushing the teeth after a meal, and
I do it along. That's it, just a habit. A habit, okay?! So forgive
yourself and try to change.