Between Master And Disciples

In my early years, I was brought up by my maternal grandparents, but when I was old enough to attend school, I moved back with my parents, and hence began a life of misery and pain. I would be beaten up at anytime. Tears and fears were my constant companions. When we were graduating from junior high school, I recall my classmates saying that they had never seen me laugh. I watched stupefied as they laughed happily, wondering how people could laugh.

I lived an austere life that was no fun at all. Apart from doing my homework, my daily duty was to do the household chores. I was not even allowed to eat with my family at the dining table, but was fed the leftovers in a corner. Very often I woke up from dreams and wept quietly until the pillow was wet. I found no love in life. I had no friends and almost never talked to anyone. During the daytime and in my dreams, I found greatest consolation in imagining having a pair of loving parents who had come to take me home. As I grew up, despair, discontentment and resentment toward life had me frantically grabbing at anything, hoping to find love and a refuge for my heart. However, my heart broke in despair again and again. It was terrible! If Master had not come to save me, I do not know where my soul would have fallen.

Immediately after initiation, my heart changed completely. Suddenly, I beheld the beautiful white clouds and the blue sky, the green, green grass, the handsome trees, and the blossoming flowers. I had not seen them for a very long time, and I wanted to kiss the earth. I felt as though Master was by my side, looking at me, smiling, kissing, and hugging me like a mother.

Since then, I have lived under the loving care of the motherly Master. She picked up the broken pieces of my heart, put them together, and filled it with love. Nourished by Mom's love, my soul has begun to grow.

I always receive a wealth of blessings from Master whenever I see Her. When we were last in New York, She came by my side many times, giving me comfort. That night, the grief and anguish that had built up over a millennium swelled up inside of me, and I cried for a very long time. A sister initiate offered me a glass of fruit juice, saying that it had been blessed by Master. I drank the juice, and like a miracle, my sorrows suddenly vanished and my heart was filled with tranquility.

Now my everyday work is to meditate diligently and follow Master's teachings. Each day of my life is filled with love, and I always have the chance to learn the right lesson at the right time. In my daily life, I can always perceive each and every one of Master's miracles, every lesson, as well as every bit of Her concern. Reveling in Her love every day, I am the luckiest child on earth! I have the greatest Master -- Ching Hai, the Almighty of the universe, who delivers beings from the three realms. I have a Mother -- Ching Hai, who dotes on Her children. She is the wisest, the most benevolent, and the gentlest Mother! I truly realize the truth of what Jesus Christ said in the Bible, that God takes care of even the lilies of the valley, not to mention us human beings. This is so very true!

I know God is within me. I am going to spend the rest of my life serving and loving Him with all I can offer!¡¹

It was "Ching Hai," and not Qing Hai Province.

Master has graced me with Her immaculate care and love, yet I have hurt Her badly. Nevertheless, She has given me another chance, caring for me as She has always done. I have come to realize that when Master uses the term "lesson" to describe the learning process of sentient beings, Her being is full of love and expectations! In this term "lesson," there is not a trace of reprimand or excessive demand; there is only compassion and love. Since then,

I love You, Master! There are many rocks that are thirsting for Your divine love!¡¹